Happy, happy, happy, talky, talk.

Today will be my first session with my new therapist.

I have attended many different kinds of therapy over the years. Reluctantly as a teenager. Half-heartedly as a young adult. Desperately as a 30-something. My most recent stab at it was a 12 week block of session at a local drug and alcohol charity. I have done that twice in the last 14 months. 12 sessions is the maximum amount they offer without a 6 week hiatus when you can then re-refer yourself. Then it takes another 2 months to secure an appointment. It’s free and its helpful but it’s obviously not working for me.  R has offered to pay for me to see the man I’m seeing today so fingers crossed I made a good connection with him.

fingers-crossed.png

Things at home feel a little less tense. I think R can see that I’m accepting (for the first time) that alcohol is not my friend. I have always put the onus on the pills and drugs. To me they have always been the things that pull the rug from under my feet. I have always tried to keep booze from that category. I conveniently forget that WINE LEADS TO PILLS.  Maybe not straight away but me and you kid?  Its inevitable…

Wish me luck.

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7 thoughts on “Happy, happy, happy, talky, talk.

  1. Whether it’s wine pills or whatever if you are taking/drinking to self medicate its all the same thing. Alcohol will lower your inhibitions and your resolve to stay away from pills. This is why I believe very firmly in abstinence-based recover. No mind-altering substances that can thwart your good intentions. I really hope you make a good connection with this therapist. I read your story and you have been through so much. If you can survive all of that then you can climb out of this hell that is drug addiction. There is light on the other side and a life waiting for you that is full of truth, beauty and gratitude xxx

    Liked by 1 person

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